Am I too old to take money from relatives?

As a kid, money was my favorite present – preferably cash – since I could go out and use it immediately. I could never leave a store with any money left over. The happiness was much anticipated and quickly over.

When I was 21, my Dad sent me to the US with a checking account of $600. It was a smart idea to try and teach his son about managing money. However, I saw through it immediately. It was like being given a neck tie, a symbol of the grey oppressive adulthood that lay before me.

That was not the last time I received money from my parents, but those times (in college) were rarely cause for celebration. There were a few other times after college when I legitimately needed help (for my first car, student loans) but that was nearly seven years ago. Still, every year like clockwork, the money comes on birthdays and Chinese New Year. They’ve been politely offering to buy me a housewarming present from IKEA since I moved into my own place.

For those of you who want to know about me, I’m 32 years old, living on my own and working as a newsroom journalist. I make relatively good money from the job and also have a property investment. As you’d expect from a gay yuppie, I live rather comfortably. So when my Dad hands me a $100 bill when I visit or when my Aunt sends a gift certificate, I am a bit mystified as to how I should feel.

While free money is good, I don’t have the most exciting plans for it. A large chunk of my personal savings is windfall money I put aside immediately rather than spend. It’s just the sort of responsible thing my Dad wished I would have done when I was a teenager.

Still it’s a little embarrassing for my inner adult, like having my Mom peel shrimps for me in a fancy restaurant. Whilst we go through many developmental milestones on our path to becoming independent adults, the relationship with our parents is sometimes slow to change. They still remember us in diapers, fondly.

I’ve never been a big fan of making an issue out of dollars & cents. If someone makes a move for the bill at a restaurant, I don’t try to tackle them. I generally trust that when people offer to do something it’s because they want to and I accept that graciously. When I take the bill, I also expect this same understanding.

After all I’m lucky to have supportive parents/relatives who are still in a position to offer their financial assistance.